


A Little Cloudy

by annoying_kuriboh



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Mental Health Issues, sean tries his best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-10-01 20:01:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20387950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annoying_kuriboh/pseuds/annoying_kuriboh
Summary: (Written in Third Person) Sean noticed. He doesn't know exactly what it is that bothers you, but he is trying to find it out and tries his best to make you feel better. Or at least less sad. And if all you can do is cry on his shoulder, that's alright too.





	A Little Cloudy

**Author's Note:**

> On my way back home yesterday I was thinking of writing something like this. I've had a rough time recently and had depression for years- sometimes wished to read something like this where your favourite character comforts you and attempts to make you feel better. Plus its written in third person because you, as the reader, know how you feel while Sean doesn't and you want to know how he goes about it. Here it is ♡

These last couple of days had felt truly strange. As if a thick cloud followed Sean around wherever he went, sprinkled with concerns and doubts. It was only the cloud casting a shadow until today and he thinks he finally figured out why it was there in the first place. This isn't his cloud. He is all sunshine and chirping birds, always damn lucky whatever he did. It's her. Her cloud, her concerns, her doubts. And Sean has no idea where any of it comes from.

While the sky above turns darker, sun setting down behind the trees on the edge of camp, Sean finds the time to take her aside and intends to talk with her, ask what was on her mind. He doesn't know why, cannot put a finger on it, though he is painfully aware she wasn't the same person anymore. That young thing with a laugh so beautiful and contagious it would leave his sides aching from laughing along with her, whose smile can melt ice and turn knees weak. But she didn't smile for days. Did not laugh, either. It never took Sean much effort to see her happy and bright, so he struggles on this day as much as he did the two or three before when he first noticed.

She looks so awfully tired, too.

Eyes puffy and red. From crying..? 

"C'mon, girl," Sean tries to sound as always, cheerful and carefree, "Have a seat!" Promptly he sits down on the ground, back against a tree and legs outstretched.  
She hesitates though, chews on her lower lip before following his actions. Her eyes glance around, almost as if she fears someone caught them slacking off. It wasn't quite that, he didn't bring her further away from camp and the others to sit in the grass and be lazy. The thoughts he had earlier, about this little cloud being hers, they want out and beg for clearance.

If only he knew how to go about it.

"So," he starts, voice quiet, arm draped around her waist, "Are ya feelin' alright?"

She refuses to look at Sean directly, probably thinks of a response that doesn't make him worry too much. He wonders why. Of all the people she was the last that needed to be cautious and hesitant around him. 

"I... guess I do." Her eyes remain focused on the buttons of Sean's shirt as if they're real interesting, way more capturing than what he actually said. "Just tired."

"Yeah, I can get behind that," Sean says and pulls her closer, "I ain't felt tired for days on end though." He doubts, truly doubts this was the right thing to say, a good way to dig deeper. Her expression changes ever so slightly, eyebrows draw together and lips form a thin line. 

"But I been feelin' pretty beaten down some days too, y'know? Happens to the best of us I reckon." Sean doesn't take his eyes off of her. Not one second.

"It ain't... like this," she begins and he noticed her fingers messing around with the fabric of her shirt, "Its different." 

Those short sentences are making him feel worse than before. Maybe she simply doesn't want to talk about it. Perhaps doesn't need to in the first place and it really was as simple as being tired from all the crap that happens around the camp, constant bickering and commanding of the girls. "How's it different?"

"I don't know what I'm feeling, Sean."

Something pulls at his heart. Feels like a cold hand clenching its fingers tight around it and for the first time Sean is speechless. How doesn't she know what she feels? There sure is a name for every emotion. Right? He digs around for words in his head while the woman's fingers twist and pull at clothes. 

"You ain't knowin'?" And despite the ice in his chest he still pulls her frame closer against himself, almost as if Sean hopes to warm up again like this. 

It's not about him.

He knows as much.

It seems to be all he knows, though.

"No," her head dips against the tree behind them, face turns to look at Sean, "Its scary... I'm afraid of everything-"

Those are things Sean can try and deal with. Now it's both his arms around her, one behind and the other draped over the girl's stomach. Sean shifts to come as close as possible, slowly the coldness makes way for a more threatening, almost suffocating sensation. Breath comes short, slow but heavy. 

She has no reason to be scared. Nothing is going to harm her, no one will, Sean isn't going to let them-

"Of everything..?" Sean assumes he understands now. This whole deal with the Grays and Braithwaites is dangerous. He got so close to being burned to a crisp back on that stupid tobacco field, and fire isn't exactly his best friend either. "Them whole things with those families? Ain't nothin' gonna happen, alright, we sure know what we doin' there!" The corners of his lips turn up some, but hers didn't. Not in the slightest.

"No, no, that... I..." Her eyes close for a second and she breathes out through the nose. "Its different and not about the feud or the plan or-- or what else is happening around here-- I... I don't know what it is." 

"You're afraid." He got this far.

"Yes."

And he isn't going to stop now. "Okay."

"...okay?" It almost sounds desperate.

Of course it wasn't okay.

"Okay. I can handle that."

"I..." 

"You doubtin' me..?" She better doesn't! He was the worst at things he can do best, bad when it comes to dealing with negative emotions because Sean rarely has to face them. But he sure as hell isn't a fool. Most of the time-- but that isn't the point.

Important was that she is scared of things Sean can't see or put his finger on, the fact she had the courage to admit this to him enough for the time being because he figures it must have been difficult. Emotions are never really easy to handle, not if you feel them fiercely and sometimes heavy. 

"I don't doubt you, Sean," her hand hesitantly slides up on his arm and rests on his shoulder, "Just... myself..."

"We got lots in common, a'rite? Though," Sean takes her into his arms, a tight embrace she doesn't fight against, "I ain't ever doubting ya." 

When before Sean didn't know what to say, now with her in his arms and her body trembling slightly against his, there are so many things he wants to say. Face buries in the crook of his neck, Sean's head leans back and they stay like this while he caresses her back along the spine. Up and down slow, matching her breathing. 

"Its gonna be fine, y'hear me?" His eyes close when she begins to cry almost silently, all he feels was how her shoulders shake and the wetness of tears on his neck. Sean doesn't mind any of it. "You do so good, hangin' on like that. A real fighter you are, fierce'n strong. That's why I'm loving ya." Fingers continue to stroke through her hair, soft and soothing motions. "And crying ain't a bad thing. Feelin' sad ain't. No one got the right to judge ya for it, and I'm thinking... its makin' you tougher."

Sure. Hugs don't make any of this go away. They're no cure, no miracle, no antidote. Neither are his words. But if this was all Sean can do, and as long as she doesn't pull away from him or tells him off, he doesn't think about stopping anytime soon. 

While the sky darkened and Javier played tunes up ahead, the little cloud that followed them around grew smaller with each passing minute. No more raindrops. Soon enough, and there Sean is certain, there'll be rainbows and lots of sunshine again.

He will try. As best as he can, to understand and help her through all of this.

"I'm real proud of you."


End file.
